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Benine du Toit

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Unhappily, behind the glamorous pictures lies everyday reality.

It's the alcohol

It appears to be pleasurable

Go to the edge, then to the edge of the edge, where water finally smothers land

I don’t know why I wanted to show it to you anyway

Don’t mow it for a while and watch how an ecosystem develops and changes

"What happened to us was like a quiet river that overflows one day and surprises even the people who are camping peacefully beside it."

Every family seems to have its story, its worn newspaper clip, of the battle

Be weak or strong just be

Finding the notes

tough lives, tender mercies

I can't describe it so there's no point

They made it very hard for her

I never believed

"Surrounding and confusing prey is a classic predatory tactic,"

hopeless feeling inside

You don't know me

We are in fact astonishingly alike

Torn, and tormented

I see more than you think

I know you blame me

Digging deep but finding nothing

I did not know if I was contagious and so I drew away from people

I miss having you around

I'm sure you are busy that's why you haven't written

I resent the choices you've made

"somewhat withdrawn"

I still search for you in the crowds even though I know that you're not here anymore

I have always had a fear of sharing

I know you talk about me

Sometimes I wonder whether I'll be happier living as a nudist

Benine du Toit

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